I wish I did. I’ve been in the same situation too many times.
I’ve never been good at maintaining friendships and I often feel that I’ve been boring people when people invite me to an event.
Do you have a mutual interest with the friends? Maybe you could discuss that with them and you’ll feel more comfortable and be able to show some enthusiasm? I find that when I talk about science or other subjects that I like I’m much more engaging, less shy and interesting. :)
Just adding on— Maybe they just don’t understand you and how to show they care, because just inviting you to places isn’t enough. If you feel this way, you should let them know if you can, because if they truly care about you, then they’ll help you with what you need to truly flourish.
Or maybe you guys aren’t tight because it wasn’t meant to be. That’s fine, too! Sometimes things don’t work out. I get that. I’ve been in that situation countless times, and regardless of whether or not it’s your fault or the fault of others, it’s hard to find what makes you happy. For everyone to assume that the answer is always easily available is absurd. Those people think you’re boring because you don’t speak out of turn? Then maybe it’s time to say “fuck it” and move on, because I bet you’re an amazing human being who deserves much more. You shouldn’t hang on to friends because they’re there; you should do it because you want to. Because you think it’s worth it.